they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
The ass gains better be worth it
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
