I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize