Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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