What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
