i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
