Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
