I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
