just tell him i said nine months
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
