I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize