Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
