There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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