My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
