would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
