life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Randomize
