Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
