I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Blood and glitter go together right?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
