i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
