Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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