I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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