She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
