Say something about gay babies.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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