We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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