oh god the rape fog is back!
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
