i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
