her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
