i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
