even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
