is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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