you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
