how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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