so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
