The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
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