If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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