whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
are you so shy because you have an std?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I AM VODKA MAN
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
