my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize