Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
