when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
