Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
