he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
