I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
