Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
