okay pat passed out under dana's car
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
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