weddingsv make me drug and hornr
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize
