Can i not drive my cunt home
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
