Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
