I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
