There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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