what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize