I'll bet she douches with gravy.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
