its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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