i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize