yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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