I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
