I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
